An Open Letter to A Daughter

In the season of open letters, Anupama Jain writes one to her daughter and impart some valuable lessons in her trademark ‘(s)mothering’ style. 

Dearest Daughter,

I’m back with yet another open letter to you, girl! I know one rarely reads open letters but it’s time the churning within got a closure.

Anyway, let me not digress as I am wont to. How quickly time has flown since you, my second-born, (of course the most perfect newborn ever!) were presented grandly as a delicate pink rosebud, to now, where you are looking to fly off the nest. You are growing up way too fast honey and it is a big bad world out there.

As your eagle-eyed mom, let me dispense with some time-tested gyaan, that will stand you in good stead. Now don’t fade out or start rolling your eyes!

Priye, don’t enjoy your teenage years!

Don’t wink. Don’t talk with your eyes. Don’t attempt to break the set rules society!

You dare indulge, someone somewhere who has been angered because someone else is living it up, will hound you, troll you, even put a case against you! Because anything and everything offends the scorekeepers and the torchbearers of societal Sanskaariyat.

Girl, tread lightly will you and stop smiling please because grave anger is in.

So Saree really because the world goes the whole nine yards! Cover up else the Great-Indian-Online-Violence will be unleashed even before you can blink. Untold vitriol will be spilled. But don’t worry, I have placed the orders for tents in various colours for you.

On a serious note, when a humorless nation forgets to take a chill pill, gets ruffled at the drop of a hat or is relentlessly angry,  a worried mother hopes that sanity will eventually prevail and apt battles will be chosen.

Let us pick our wars, shall we? The next-gen will have to pause for a second to consider events in their entire context. They will have to mull for a minute, whether what they consider a festering issue is worth the quixotic effort of going all out charging at the windmills.

Jio aur Jeene Do. Kyonki ladayian aur bhi hain jeetne ko. How easy is it to agree to simply disagree and carry on living? Hope floats!

Also, do enjoy the sweet moments, make small memories, thereby complete the big beautiful picture.

My Lil flower, my fledgling, I hope I have succeeded in making you sensible, generous and strong enough to watch out for all the hyenas,.

Let it be known that, you drive me insane. Thanks to you kiddo, My BP has shot up by several notches. I am suspicious, I am beginning to sport a bald pate, the expensive giggly haircuts notwithstanding.

But would I ever have it any other way?

I’m a Mother till I’m boxed and I’m warning you girl, I will be watching you from the world above too. Yeah, I’m going to heaven, First Class! No way in hell! So, no respite there too.

I finally wind up with these words ( That is the pattern – I Praise, I then Castigate, then give the finishing touches by giving you some Ceolho worthy Gyaan)

I am crossing fingers and hoping that I have been able to pass onto you what my parents have taught me. I can only fervently pray that you achieve all that you dream and more – That I was scared even to think of. Soar sky high, shatter moulds while staying firmly rooted.

BTW, Dad also feels the same for all the above! Remember he is 50% responsible for all the mayhem that got unleashed.

So there!

Yours Eternally,

Your (S)mothering Amma/Mom


Anupama Jain is a writer and teacher based out of Gurgaon, India. She is the founding member of Senior School Moms and a blogger. Anupama is the author of the novel, When Padma Bani Paula.

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